Proper 26 B - James 5:16 - Faked Accountability - Jim Kallam in "Risking Church"
" I joined a small group of men who met during the workweek. Brent, told us one week that his wife and two girls were doing well, but his job at a market research firm was tenuous.
But fast-forward. Now he's 30 pounds lighter, hair slicked back, living with a woman he met on the internet! Why didn't Brent tell us back then that he found his budding romance in cyberspace? We couldn't encourage him to love and good deeds because we didn't know his struggles.
After six months, I realized that, like Brent, all the men were 'playing' community. Any time one of us would try to speak about life in an honest way, the group would ignore that person. We felt like fools if we brought up a struggle, or even a joy, for that matter. They wanted to display their knowledge and acheviedments rather than express their doubts, fears or failures. One guy in the group, Ernie, siad it best: "I don't like to do things where I don't look like I have my act together."
I tried to change these superficial relationships to no avail. Eventually I told the group leader that I found participating in the group oppressive and stressful, and bowed out."
MY RESPONSE: Am I in a group that is trapped in superficial camaraderie? "
But fast-forward. Now he's 30 pounds lighter, hair slicked back, living with a woman he met on the internet! Why didn't Brent tell us back then that he found his budding romance in cyberspace? We couldn't encourage him to love and good deeds because we didn't know his struggles.
After six months, I realized that, like Brent, all the men were 'playing' community. Any time one of us would try to speak about life in an honest way, the group would ignore that person. We felt like fools if we brought up a struggle, or even a joy, for that matter. They wanted to display their knowledge and acheviedments rather than express their doubts, fears or failures. One guy in the group, Ernie, siad it best: "I don't like to do things where I don't look like I have my act together."
I tried to change these superficial relationships to no avail. Eventually I told the group leader that I found participating in the group oppressive and stressful, and bowed out."
MY RESPONSE: Am I in a group that is trapped in superficial camaraderie? "
Men of Integrity; May/June 2006; Promise Keepers.
posted by shaun | 9:18 AM
1 Comments:
I was in a similar situation. Our group of men was meeting for approx 3 years and no one ever really confessed anything except basic things like selfishness, pride, impatient, not trusting God.
But no one really confessed anything. Then I found that the one person in the group was having difficulty in his marriage and I never knew because he never talked about it. I later was told from the organizer of the group that he was leaving the church and the group stopped meeting. Later a man from the group asked me to start meeting again. I was reluctant because like them I was not being open and I feared it would be a waste. But to make a long story short I meet anyway and confessed that I was struggling with looking at porn on the internet. He also had a problem and this has led to many more men confessing to sexual impurity, in thought and deed. This has led to revival in my life and church. So I guess we need to remember to confess our sins to one another like our father in heaven has commanded and then we can start to see spiritual healing and strength in our families.
Post a Comment
<< Home